A few minutes later, Elsie danced back into his room. The golden silk brocade dress fit her perfectly, and Horace could not help smiling. His child was lovely, and every day she seemed to grow more like her beautiful mother. Elsie twirled with pleasure, and Horace said, "It's a perfect fit. You can tell Aunt Chloe to dress you in it for church tomorrow, and if the weather is still cool, you can wear your new coat and hat as well."

Elsie suddenly stopped her dance and looked at him seriously. "But Papa, I'm afraid that I shall be thinking only about my new clothes if I wear them on the Sabbath."

"That's nonsense, Elsie," he said with a hint of irritation. "Sunday is a day much like any other, and this sensitivity of yours about the Sabbath displeases me very much, as you know. Now, don't look so distressed, I'm sure you will get over it by-and-by. In fact, I believe I have seen improvements in your attitude already."

Their last confrontation had been causes by Elsie's strict beliefs about observing the Sabbath, but he was determined not to make a problem of it this time. It was an indication of how little Horace understood of Elsie's faith that he mistook her obedience to the Scriptures for childishness.

But what he had said frightened Elsie. Her father turned to remove some other things from one of his trunks and did not see the anguish in her face. Was he right, she asked herself. Had she indeed changed? Was she less conscientious in her attention to God's commands? Had she dishonored her Savior? Beyond her control, a sharp cry escaped her lips as she lifted a fervent prayer to her ever-forgiving Savior and Friend.

From "Elsie's Impossible Choice," Book 2, pages 14-16

ELSIE FACED CRITICISM FOR HER STRONG CONVICTIONS

Have you ever had your feelings hurt because someone criticized your beliefs or behaviors? When Horace criticized Elsie for her strong convictions about the Sabbath, it nearly broke Elsie's heart. Horace didn't intentionally mean to hurt Elsie. As a matter of fact, he really didn't understand her deep devotion to Christ's commands. But nonetheless, his comments caused Elsie to question her own love and commitment to God.

At the sound, Horace turned to her in astonishment. "What is it, my child?" he asked and drew her to him. "Is it what I said? I surely didn't mean to hurt your feelings over such a trifling matter."

Elsie couldn't stop her tears now, and she clung to her father as she sobbed out her doubts. "Oh Papa. Can it be true that I don't love Jesus as I used to?"

"Is that all, dear? Well, I think you are a very good girl, though you are being a bit silly perhaps."

He wiped her tears with his handkerchief and changed the subject, cheering her with his tales of what he had seen and done in New Orleans. Still, she was more reserved than she had been for some time, and after she had gone to dress for dinner, Horace thought about the strange incident. "I wonder if I will ever understand her," he said aloud to himself. "It's strange how often I seem to hurt her when I mean only to please."

But that night, Elsie took her questions to the One who always listens. She asked Him to guard her heart against anything that might take first place from Him, and she once again felt the peace that comes from knowledge of His tender love.

From "Elsie's Impossible Choice," Book 2, pages 14-16

A TEACHABLE HEART

It was hard for Elsie to hear what her father said, even if his intentions were not to hurt her. But Elsie was wise to go to God with her concerns. She was teachable because she opened her heart to questioning, but best of all, she allowed God to search her heart. She turned to Him for peace and assurance when she felt insecure.

You may already know that receiving criticism can be a bitter pill to swallow no matter what your age or experiences have been! In Elsie's case, her father innocently criticized her commitment to the Sabbath, calling it "nonsense." It's hard enough to face criticism when the person doesn't have ill intentions, like with Horace. But what about when someone intentionally criticizes you? If you have a hard time receiving or responding to criticism, it may be that God wants to teach you something!

A LESSON IN CHARACTER-BUILDING

You may not want to hear this, but receiving criticism can build character in your life if you look at it from the right perspective. We've all heard the phrase, "constructive criticism," and that's exactly what you can make it, even criticism that seems intentionally scathing and hurtful. Here are some helpful tips for dealing with criticism.

1. A proper attitude

To receive criticism with a proper attitude, you must be anchored in your relationship with Christ. Knowing who you are in Christ will give you the confidence to face up to any challenge that comes your way. Feeling secure in your walk with God comes by knowing God and learning about His promises in the Bible. This means that you need to spend time reading your bible and learning about the God you serve. It also means beginning to understand the new creation you are in Christ. This is a life-long process, but start now and begin enjoying the special person you are as a child of God! Elsie made it a point to read the Bible and apply God's instruction to her life. She had a good understanding of God's love for her. That is why she was able to face hardships with courage and wisdom.

2. Letting go of pride

As you become more secure in God's love for you, you will be more "thick-skinned" and able to accept criticism with grace and poise. Much of this has to do with dying to your pride. For it is really our pride that gets aroused and angry when someone criticizes us. But if our hearts are submitted to God, we can leave our pride at the door and not allow anger or hurt to take control of our emotions. This takes a good dose of self-control and self-discipline. But again, if you know who you are in Christ, then you will know that, "God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline." (2 Timothy 1:7). Find your confidence in God's Word, not in the words of people who criticize you. Elsie turned to God after her episode with Horace. She knew that God would reveal His truth to her about the situation and her own doubts. You should also turn to God whenever you are criticized and have uncertainties about the situation.

3. Look for the good in it

It's important to remember that criticism can be good. Horace's comments caused Elsie to examine her heart. Be open to what people are saying to you and ask yourself if there is any truth to what they say. It's also a good idea to get the opinion of people you trust, like your parents. Ask them if the criticism has any truth to it. If it does not, then do not cling to it or allow the criticism to discourage you. Just move on! But if you realize there is some truth to the criticism, consider making a change. This shows that you have a teachable spirit and are able to learn from others, which is so important to your growth and maturity as a Christian.

4. Do unto others

Since you know that criticism can be hurtful, always remember to treat other people with respect and kindness. Strive to live your life by the fruit of the Spirit, which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). Reflect on these words from James 3:8-10:

"But no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be."

FINAL THOUGHTS

Not all criticism is destructive, and we need to have enough strength of character (and humility), to not get defensive or offended whenever we are criticized. But we must take it for what it is and use it to evaluate ourselves and make any necessary changes. And we must also be mindful to speak gently and lovingly with others, even when there are times when we must give criticism. For in Proverbs we read, "Wounds from a friend can be trusted," (Proverbs 27: 6).

So when you find yourself being criticized, receive it without anger or defense, and know that God loves you! See what God might be teaching you through the criticism, whether it is to make some changes or to learn how to deal with the criticism in a humble, godly way. And always remember to speak to other people as gently as you can, even if you find yourself giving constructive criticism to a friend. God has a way of using these uncomfortable moments as lessons for us to die to our flesh and grow in maturity. Don't be discouraged if criticism comes your way! But rather look to God for assurance and acceptance.